kristanashley wrote:
First of all, I want to apologize if my post rubbed you the wrong way - I didn't mean to sound offensive. Let me clarify. |
You didn't rub me the wrong way. :-)
I don't want Lily to feel like an outsider.All of her cousins and neighborhood friends will be public schoolers. Most kids' books and movies revolve around school. I just don't want her to feel like she's on the outside looking in when she's with her cousins or neighbors. She already loves the idea of school and I don't want her to feel like she's missing something. |
You may be making a bigger issue of this than it will really be. Remember that there are *millions* of homeschooled children today. :-) And no matter what you do, she may still feel like she's missing *something.*
I don't want Lily to think she is better than other kids.I know that this mostly depends on me and what I teach my kids - but I have met a lot of homeschoolers (mostly homeschool parents) who feel that they are more intelligent, more moralistic, and all around superior to the public school kids, who are all mindless sheep with ambitions that extend only to how many facebook friends they have. (I have actually heard that just about verbatim). |
That they behave badly doesn't mean that you have to. :-)
I don't want Lily to fear the world.I don't want her to think that we're homeschooling her because we're scared of bullies, or scared of bad teachers, or scared that she will turn out bad if we're not constantly beside her. I don't want her to be scared, or to instill any fear in her (other than fear of the Lord). |
One-on-one instruction trumps classroom instruction. All professional educators will tell you this. So if you don't say that you're homeschooling because you're afraid of bad teachers or bullies, then she won't be afraid.
I want Lily to have friends.She is so soft spoken, and it takes her a while to really open up. I would imagine it would be a lot harder to make friends with kids you only see once in a while, rather than kids you see every day. |
Spending all her time in a classroom situation will not--I repeat, will NOT--guarantee that she'll make actual *friends.*
I want Lily to have exposure to fun extra-curricular
activities.Music, art, P.E., etc. - I would just be very limited by my own abilities and resources. What I would be able to provide just wouldn't be the same as singing in a choir, learning to paint from someone who actually knows how to paint, or even just playing dodgeball with a whole class full of kids. |
Having those things may not justify the classroom experience. OTOH, there are many homeschool support groups which do those things together.
I want Lily to feel friendly competition.Spelling bees, science fairs, talent shows, etc. I think learning to win and learning to lose are important lessons (and not just in games). |
They may be important lessons, but the truth is that not all children in public (or private) schools get to do spelling bees, science fairs, talent shows, etc. I did not. OTOH, my children participated in spelling bees and science fairs with other homeschoolers; we didn't do any kind of talent shows, but both my dc did participate in "friendly competition" in their 4-H, Camp Fire, and Highland dance groups. Again, all things considered, choosing public school for the sake of the *possibility* of doing spelling bees and whatnot...well, in your head, they would be fun, but they shouldn't be a big factor in the decision.
I want Lily to know that she can make a positive difference
in the lives of others.One of the benefits of public school is the diversity of people that you see. She will meet kids who are poor. Kids with bad family lives. Kids of other races and religions. Kids who are handicapped. Kids who are learning disabled. This allows her the opportunity to interact with them, to be a friend, and to make a positive impact. I know that I can take her to volunteer somewhere, but it's not the same as living out relationships on a daily basis and knowing that you made someone's life a little brighter. |
Why do you imagine that homeschoolers don't meet a diversity of people???
I don't want Lily to feel trapped.The thought of staying with my mom (even as a kid) every hour of every day sends shivers up my spine - and I love my mama - she's my best friend. I just don't want Lily to feel like that. I don't want her to feel stuck under my thumb |
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Huh. Well, just because you have that kind of relationship with your mother doesn't mean that Lily will feel the same way. In fact, I believe that God intended parents to be the most important, influential people in their children's lives--not classroom teachers, not the other children at school.
I don't want a chaotic life.Sometimes I feel like I'm barely keeping it together already. I don't know how I'm going to manage with the baby too. |
I understand this. But homeschooling isn't chaotic. And you'll learn to handle everything. I promise. :-)
I don't know if I have the perseverance.What if I decide I'm done, I can't handle it, it's not working, but it's the middle of the school year? OR what if I get slack with her school? What if I let something important slip through the cracks? It's a lot of pressure. |
Well, you might not be able to handle it. If not, you can send her to school. Most of us can, though. And define "slack." You care about her education, and you'll see that she is educated, even if what you do on a daily basis doesn't always look like school. You won't forget anything important, either. "Oh, drat! I forgot to teach my dc how to read!! What will I do now?" 
I don't know if it's fair to condemn the school system
without trying it.Condemn is a strong word. I guess I meant that I don't know if it's fair to forgo public school without trying it. |
Why? Why should school be the default? Why shouldn't homeschooling be the default?
I want Lily to find her place in the world outside of our
family.I don't mean I want to throw her to the wolves and make her own way, but I want her to find her niche. Unfortunately in this ugly world, kids can't roam the neighborhood and the forest to explore and play anymore like they did in the past. Public school offers a relatively safe place to experience life apart from mom. |
I understand that you didn't mean throwing her to the wolves. But a young child needs to be with her mother for many, many years, so that she can have the skills to face the world. And since when has school been a "relatively safe place"? Really?
I want Lily to be happy I wish I had a crystal ball, but I know the Lord just wants me to come to him and trust in his plan, wherever that may lead me and my family. |
We all want that. :-)
I believe that part of God's plan is that He gives us authority to decide things like how our children should be educated. IOW, you can choose either a classroom-based education or homeschooling. Either one would be His plan for you.